What Does Love Look Like?

You know, there's something quite awesome and amazing about experiencing selfless love.  Love that sacrifices, love that is gentle and compassionate, love that doesn't need to understand the hows or the whys.  Love that changes hearts and people.

When we were driving home two nights ago Ryan said, "This event really has changed me."

I think it was about three weeks ago that we started to initially feel some changes.  Our adoption story and the story of our dear friends was shared on a local television news station.  The result of that brought many changes.  Some good, some not-so-good, and even some sad.  Some of the comments and mentalities of others is nothing short of shocking and rude.  I don't feel sad for us.  I know who we are.  I feel sad for the people with such ignorance, really.  But, many MORE people showered us with  love.  One completely anonymous donor gifted our family $1000.  That's really hard to swallow.  I can't even type that without getting tearful.  No identity tagged to the number.  Love is humble.

My two amazing friends and colleagues made a YouTube video about us and sent it to Ellen DeGeneres. :)  They have staked claim in this ordeal and are such little warriors for justice, you might say.  Love is courageous, and bold, and sometimes tenacious.

And then our story was shared in our local newspaper!  My mom and I were crying of laughter as I read bits to her, because in all honesty, I was really embarrassed by the article.  Aside from several inaccuracies about certain details about us and our friends, there were some statements attached to my name that were not at all what I said.  Beyond my embarrassment, I was worried! I was worried that people would actually think that my heart was what was depicted in the story.  Mom's love grounds me.   Being able to laugh at the ridiculousness of the statements and being reminded from one of my dearest, Esther, that people who really know me won't blink an eye... this is genuine love.

One of my sweet little Kinders caught wind of these t-shirt sales that our family is doing.  He asked his mom to order one for him too!  But somehow I think his sweet little 6 year old mind got stuck on "shirts" and so one day last week when he and his momma were shopping at Target, he insisted that he need to buy me a shirt!  So the very next day at school, in walks Little Man with a brown paper bag, and the most beautiful purple-blue Merona brand t-shirt I've ever seen.  In fact, I'm wearing it right now!! :)  Love is child-like too.  Pure and innocent, and assumes nothing.

Our GoFund Me button shows that we have met our $4,000 goal for fundraising!  A handful of dear high school friends really took it upon themselves to spread the message about this little button -- and wowza! Our goal has been met (and even surpassed!!)!  These funds will help us with our first agency fee!  Many classmates I haven't seen in literally 15 years or more -- decided to open up their hearts and give one more little cheer to the quiet, sometimes nerdy Homecoming Queen and her family.  :)  Sometimes love is spontaneous.

And most recently, this very special event that changed Ryan. Two nights ago we (and our friends) were the 'guests of honor' at a spaghetti dinner benefit, to help us try to recover some of our losses from the agency bankruptcy.  Words just cannot tell you what it feels like to see over 300 faces, tiny baby faces through great-grandparent faces, come into one place to do nothing more than bless others.  Great food, great activities, and the fellowship was amazing.  Sometimes loves means simply "showing up".

Easter Sunday is right around the corner.  The most picture-perfect example of True Love -- God gave His only Son -- for us.  We are so undeserving of this kind of Love.  But it is given to us every single day.  Thank you, Jesus.  THIS is the kind of love that changed the world.

The Light Will Be On, The Welcome Mat Out...

Haiti Journey -- door closed.  Ethiopia Journey #1 -- door closed.  Search for new agency -- A few doors closed.  Mom's friend told her, "The doors are closing because they're the wrong doors."

I love that...  "They're the wrong doors."

She didn't say, "The doors are made of steel with padlocks, never to be opened."  She simply said, "They're the wrong doors."

Mom encouraged me -- "God will turn the light on and put the Welcome mat out."  Peace.  Yes,  He will.


We are completely overwhelmed with the love and support that is coming our way.  Kind words, cards, emails, prayers, donations -- many from complete strangers or friends we haven't seen for several years.  Just amazing.

Tonight after bedtime prayers Johnathan asked, "When is Baby Opia coming, Mom?"  And sweet Tenleigh's response was, "He's gonna come in my tummy now."  Noooooo, little monkey, that's not quite the way it works. :)  I can tell that Johnathan is starting to wonder about this "paper pregnancy".  He told some of his kindergarten friends yesterday that "My mommy is going to Africa in a couple of sleeps." Sigh.  Sweet boy, so tuned-in to changes.

Tenleigh Anna keeps our minds whirling, and our hearts thumping.  I often think, "Where in the WORLD does she get this stuff!?"... apparently she gets some of it from me, as it seems that her little ears are tuning in to everything. :)  She has been really into playing "wedding" lately.  She'll suddenly announce to Johnny that he's her husband, and it's time for the wedding!  (The first time they played, he was the cowboy, and she was the princess!)  The other night, Tens was all decked out in her princess gown, with heels and (upside-down) crown.  Johnathan put on his black pants, vest, dress shirt and tie.  He even slicked down his hair.  Tenleigh wrapped her arm around him, kissed his cheek and said, "Good-bye, Husband. Have a good day.  Be a goooooood listener, and... don't lose my purse."  I busted a gut because I knew EXACTLY where she got, "... don't lose my purse!"

Monday morning, satan was really trying to have his way with me I think.  The night before, our family's adoption story was shared on a local news station, and God's call to "defend and love the fatherless" was being shared.  So I'm sure satan was trying to wedge his way into this work.  But anyway -- the following morning was nothing short of completely nuts.  Johnny and I were putting our coats and shoes on, and Tens was still thrashing her little body on the mudroom floor, having a full-blown tantrum in her pajamas.  I shoved her clothes into her backpack and told her that she'd have to get dressed at preschool today. Fast-forward 2 seconds, and I've wrestled this little tornado into her carseat, only to soon discover that I have NO car keys.  Ryan (again -- yes, again -- for the 3rd time) has taken my set with him to downtown Minneapolis.  Of course he's not answering his phone, and you know I'm running about 15 minutes late already.  I leave a sweet, little message (read with sarcasm) that said something along the lines of.... "I can't have you losing my keys!"  Be careful, be careful -- what you say!! ;)

So you see, life is getting back to 'normal' for us.  ;)  Fun play, tender prayers, and even a little bit of CraZy. :)

Prayers go up -- blessings come down.

~ Simply Love!! ~

First thing's first... I finally figured out how to add pictures to my blog!!  Halleluia!! Only took about 14 months, but who's counting!? :)

I am SO excited about these cute Simply Love t-shirts that we're selling as a fundraiser for our adoption.  The first two rounds of our adoption we decided not to do any fundraising.  This time we know that we have to.  But I think these look great and I hope they'll be a hit!  All sizes are available. The smallest size is youth XS.  The women's t-shirt comes in unisex or junior cut.  If you're interested in purchasing a t-shirt, please send me an email at: heartstrings2911@yahoo.com and I'll hook you up! Thank you so much!!

Women's Front

Women's Back

Men's Front

Men's Back

When I'm On My Knees...

"There I am before the Love that changes me.
I don't know how, but there's power when I'm on my knees..."


I've heard these lyrics probably a thousand times, and I've always loved Jaci Valesquez's song.  But I can't say that the words had ever really spoken to me as much as they do now.  These last few weeks have brought me to my knees on so many levels.

I think that most people might think that our financial loss is the main thing that has brought me to my knees.  And yes, that's a great part of it.  But it's really become about so much more than loss.  The blessings far outweigh the loss.

I've been brought to my knees in Thanksgiving -- for the amazing, courageous, and thoughtful friends that have decidedly turned themselves into little "warriors" for our family.  Trying to spread the word to others about ways to support us.  I am completely humbled at the time and dedication that they have put into these efforts.

I've been brought to my knees as I learn the horror and realities facing orphans in today's world.  I am devouring a new book I just found called Orphan Justice.  Mmm... it's a good one.  A "must read" for  every Christian I believe.

I've been brought to my knees as God is teaching me about patience.  As we work through the next steps of our adoption process, we are waiting to hear back on some dossier details with the agency that we're hoping to contract with.  And of course... still trying to get our dossier back into our hands.  That feels a bit like a nail-biter to me.  I can handle dealing with agencies here in the US, but I don't totally love that our 6 month life project is in Addis Ababa right now, and our former agency is virtually non-existent.

I am on my knees in prayer constantly.  For direction and clarity, for courage and patience.  For continued faith and hope.  I love the way the words in Scripture are jumping out at me as if I have never read them before.

And let's not forget when I'm on my knees playing "Tickle Monster", "Beauty Shop", or "Uno".  These beautiful babes of mine upstairs in their beds.  So healthy, rowdy, and pure.  Their belly laughs and precious imaginations bring us such joy, every day.

When I am on my knees I see the blessings, and the Love that changes me.